


Good

by heyHEYOhSorry



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:47:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27501808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heyHEYOhSorry/pseuds/heyHEYOhSorry
Summary: Gwen isn’t a good person.
Relationships: Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Gwen/Morgana (Merlin)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 28





	Good

Gwen isn’t a good person.

She knows that they all see her as such. Arthur, Leon, Gaius. Even Merlin, who distrusts almost everyone on some level, thinks she’s a good person. Sure, he hasn’t informed her about his magic yet but he comes to her, leans on her.

Still, Gwen knows, she isn’t a good person.

There are moments that Gwen relives in her dreams. The moment her father died. The day Elyan left home. Her first kiss with Arthur.

Recently, the moment Gwen can’t escape from is the moment Morgana pointed a sword to her throat and told Gwen the prophecy.

Despite the death and changes that have occurred in her life, that was the most defining moment. And it wasn’t the fear of dying, it was hearing that she, a simple house servant, was going to wear a crown in Camelot.

Her mother had been a believer of magic. She had warned Gwen growing up how magic can trick and deceive, but also how it can illuminate and tell truth.

At that moment, Gwen had felt it. Had felt the truth in Morgana’s words. That she Guinevere Smith daughter of a Blacksmith, would sit on the throne of Camelot.

She has only told one person about Morgana’s prophecy, and that was Lancelot. It had been late. Lancelot had been keeping Gwen company in the kitchen as she tidied up. Nothing salacious, until the sun continued to lower.

She had told Lancelot because she knew she wasn’t being fair to him. He believed her when she told him what Morgana had said. And he had trusted her so easily it made Gwen care for him even deeper. “Arthur will be blessed by the gods to have you as a bride,” Lancelot whispered as he hugged her goodnight. And then with a small bow he smiled and added, “Sweet dreams, my Queen.”

But Gwen had stayed awake that night. Replaying Lancelot’s words. Basking in the confidence he exalted, declaring that Gwen would marry Arthur. And yet, Gwen herself was uncertain, thinking about the other Pendragon with a claim to the throne living miles away.

The Pendragon Gwen had learned to coax to sleep by rubbing two fingers along the silkiness of her walls. The Pendragon who would kiss down Gwen’s body, her long black hair tossed over her pale shoulders as she bent her head to part Gwen’s fold with her wet tongue.

See Gwen isn’t a good person because she’s in love with two people.

A brother and sister, two polar opposites, current enemies at war.

And the love she carries for them both is fierce.

But back when Morgana had told her of the prophecy, the night Morgana drew a sword to Gwen’s neck and changed her life forever, then Gwen had only been in love with one person.

She laments that Morgana did not know. That to Morgana those moments were carnal pleasure and nothing more.

Even with a sword to her throat, Gwen had loved Morgana. 

Gwen isn’t a good person because had Morgana asked, Gwen would have sat next to her.

And now that the final battle is drawing nearer, Gwen walks around with guilt not nerves.

Gwen isn’t a good person because even with a Pendragon crest on her wedding finger, if Morgana were to ask Gwen, Gwen wouldn’t know what to do.


End file.
